Guilty as Charged

Oh mommy guilt...how it plagues the best of us, even though we don't like to admit it. Deep in our hearts we wonder if what we're doing with (or without) our kids will scar them for life.

Will they resent us?

Is this going to send them to counseling later in life?

Okay that's a bit dramatic, but those questions have crossed my mind on more than one occasion. 

One area I have been struggling with mommy guilt recently is the thought of bringing in another child to our family. I feel mommy guilt on both ends of the spectrum. I worry that Bug is going to feel like she's being replaced, that she's going to feel like she wasn't enough, and that she is going to resent her little brother. How do I keep her feeling loved and that having a little brother is just letting the love grow? On the other hand, I worry about Little Boy. We haven't done nearly the things with him that we did with Bug. I would read to Bug all the time when she was in my belly and play music too. When we found out we were having a girl with her, we immediately picked out a song to be "her song" and would play it over and over again for her. To this day it is still the only song that will calm her down when she is absolutely inconsolable. We've known for 10 weeks that we were having a little man and have JUST NOW found him a song! I feel like I'm really behind on the eight ball with this little guy!

 I feel almost ashamed sharing this with y'all, but I know that I'm not the only one out there who has felt this way. There are many other times that I feel that mommy guilt creeping up on me: Bug being sick for the past month is one. I just wish there was something I could do to make her all better.

But the thing with mommy guilt is that we don't have to feel it. It's a lie. We don't have to feel that guilt or worry. For me, it's a matter of trusting God. I will do the best I can, but I trust that He will make up for where I have failed. And I accept that I will fail, but I know that He is much bigger than the guilt and failure. 

Like A Morning Cup of Coffee               The Not Quite Military Wife

From Here To Eternity               Words About Waverly

Pardon My French             Beautiful Family Affairs

My Delicious Adventure                  The Life Of Faith

Running From The Law             The Olive Tree 

         

May 8:          Taming the Temper Tantrums

May 15:        Weaning from Breastfeeding or From Formula to Cow’s Milk 

May 22:        Dealing with Mommy Guilt

May 29:        When People Share Their Opinions and How to Lovingly Handle it

June 5:         Traveling with your Toddler

June 12:       How to get your toddler to eat their veggies…or their food at all

June 19:       How to make time to blog in the busyness of motherhood

June 26:       Bedtime Battles (nap or bedtime)

An InLinkz Link-up

When Nursing Ends...

It was always my goal to nurse Bug as long as she wanted, within reason of course. We were lucky that breastfeeding came easily and naturally for us, and I loved the bond that breastfeeding created and I really didn't want to give it up. Call me selfish, call me crazy, call me whatever you want, but I was willing to nurse my girl past the age of 2 if she wanted. 

By the time Bug turned one she was nursing just twice a day. Once when she first woke up and then again right before bed. Not long after turning one she switched herself to just nursing in the evening right before bed. Keep in mind that I'm pregnant and still breastfeeding. After researching and talking to my OB (I was still seeing an OB at the time and hadn't made the switch to our midwife yet), I decided to continue with breastfeeding as long Bug wanted. I just had to make sure I was eating well, which is hard to do with morning sickness.

Once Bug hit 13 months, she became less and less interested in nursing before bed. Instead, she would fidget and cuddle, but wouldn't latch. Or if she did latch, it wasn't for long. I knew my time nursing her was coming to an end. We had already made the switch to cows milk and she had no problem making that switch. But the switch hurt my feelings more than I thought it would. It helps that I have another little one on the way to look forward to breastfeeding, but I still miss the time with my little girl. There are times that I still wish we were able to continue nursing, but I know that this is what was best for my baby girl and me, so instead of wishing for what isn't, I'm extremely thankful for the 13 months that I got to spend nursing my baby girl.

Like A Morning Cup of Coffee               The Not Quite Military Wife

From Here To Eternity               Words About Waverly

Pardon My French             Beautiful Family Affairs

My Delicious Adventure                  The Life Of Faith

Running From The Law             The Olive Tree 

         

May 8:          Taming the Temper Tantrums

May 15:        Weaning from Breastfeeding or From Formula to Cow’s Milk 

May 22:        Dealing with Mommy Guilt

May 29:        When People Share Their Opinions and How to Lovingly Handle it

June 5:         Traveling with your Toddler

June 12:       How to get your toddler to eat their veggies…or their food at all

June 19:       How to make time to blog in the busyness of motherhood

June 26:       Bedtime Battles (nap or bedtime)

One Year and Beyond: Taming the Tantrums

Bug is 15 months going on two (sometimes 16). She has all of a sudden developed such personality. A lot of the time, this personality is great. She laughs and giggles and plays, and it is so much fun to watch her grow. But then there is the other side of this personality. The tantrum. And boy can she throw a royal one.

These tantrums stem from two different things:

• She isn't getting her way and is being told "no".
• She's frustrated and tired.

This little girl is stubborn, and she comes by it honestly. So when she doesn't get her way with something, whether it be a toy or she doesn't want to eat what she's been given, she lets you know. Most of these times it's screaming and throwing her hands in the air and covering her face. 

She's also now at the stage where she's trying to develop her independence. She wants to do things by herself, and when she can't accomplish what she wants, the tantrum ensues. A lot of these tantrums end up with her throwing herself on the floor and kicking and punching the ground. It can get pretty rough.

We were spending the evening with my parent's last night, and Bug was in rare form. When my dad (her Papi) walked in, she had just thrown herself on the floor and wouldn't even look at him. The first words out of his mouth, "Are you two?"

I'm still learning on how to deal with her tantrums, but for now, a few things work for us:

• Ignore her - sometimes, she just needs to cry it out. That's okay. Once she settles down, she's more apt to listen and calm down. Ignoring her also gives me a chance to gather my bearings and see what the route cause of her tantrum might be.
• Distract her - sometimes she just needs a good ole distraction from the things that she's not allowed to have.
• Help her - if she's frustrated because she wants something done and can't do it by herself, it's best sometimes if I just dive in and help her. But I'm not allowed to do it for her. I have to show her how it's done, and then let her do it on her own. 
• Rest time -  a lot of times, she's just plum exhausted and that is the reason for her tantrum. The best thing to do at this time is cuddle and turn on Mickey Mouse. It's a win-win situation for both of us. She gets to rest, and I get extra cuddles.

I'm still figuring things out with the tantrums, but for right now, these four things have come to help us when Bug decides to throw a tantrum. 

Do you have any other tips on taming the tantrum? Link up with us below! I'm always looking for new ways to help ease the tantrum.

Come link up with us every Thursday and share your wisdom. Also, come check out our mamas who have some wisdom of their own.

Like A Morning Cup of Coffee               The Not Quite Military Wife

From Here To Eternity               Words About Waverly

Pardon My French             Beautiful Family Affairs

My Delicious Adventure                  The Life Of Faith

Running From The Law             The Olive Tree          

May 8:          Taming the Temper Tantrums

May 15:        Weaning from Breastfeeding or From Formula to Cow’s Milk 

May 22:        Dealing with Mommy Guilt

May 29:        When People Share Their Opinions and How to Lovingly Handle it

June 5:         Traveling with your Toddler

June 12:       How to get your toddler to eat their veggies…or their food at all

June 19:       How to make time to blog in the busyness of motherhood

June 26:       Bedtime Battles (nap or bedtime)

Now it's time to link up your posts with us!

An InLinkz Link-up

One Year and Beyond!

Hey mamas! Boy do I have a really exciting treat for you. Starting the 8th of May, I will be getting together with ten amazing mamas to bring to you the "One year and beyond" Link up.  In this link up we want to share with you what we've found that has worked for us as new mamas to toddlers. Because we're experts  after being moms for a few years or so, right? Not really, but we have some experience and want to share what we've learned.

Like A Morning Cup of Coffee               The Not Quite Military Wife

From Here To Eternity               Words About Waverly

Pardon My French             Beautiful Family Affairs

My Delicious Adventure                  The Life Of Faith

Running From The Law             The Olive Tree          

  Last month we got together and discussed questions that moms have not only asked us but questions we've asked ourselves and put them together and now we want to share them with you. 

May 8:          Taming the Temper Tantrums

May 15:        Weaning from Breastfeeding or From Formula to Cow’s Milk 

May 22:        Dealing with Mommy Guilt

May 29:        When People Share Their Opinions and How to Lovingly Handle it

June 5:         Traveling with your Toddler

June 12:       How to get your toddler to eat their veggies…or their food at all

June 19:       How to make time to blog in the busyness of motherhood

June 26:       Bedtime Battles (nap or bedtime

We're making this a link up because like I said we don't know it all and we don't have all the answers. Therefore we'd love to see what you do/did. Don't forget to check out all of the mamas each week for their post and then link your own up your own post with us!

Will you be joining us? I'm so excited!

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